Moving air, blood rhythm, breath rhythm, define sentences a living river living verse giver gold intake fall pipe bone mover
Language is constructed breath, rhythmic gust, pneuma, ruach, spirit, constructed spirit, structured gust, blood rhythm feeds lungs, breath engine
Nana is unconsciously breathing.
he sits
on a blue plastic chair (breath) hospital bedside, her white hair, all to one side, thinking she’ll be annoyed (breath) when she wakes
with her hair all to one side.
A nurse explains that though not present
Nana may be (breath) able to hear.
The nurse leaves and Nanas breath stops
(Too long)
Then starts hurriedly, then settles down
A nurse explains it is Cheyne-stokes breathing. He can moisten her lips like this. She wets cotton bud out of white plastic cup, carefully draws bud across Nannas dry lips like painting a line, with water.
He searches web for clues
Nanas breath stops
(Too long)
He paints a line
Typically, over a period of 1 minute, a 10-20 second episode of apnoea or hypopnoea occurs (breath) followed by respirations of increasing depth and frequency. The cycle then repeats itself.
He talks to her, each day
(Breath) Remember the white Sunderland farm
where you were born, Nanna. Stories round its courtyard fire at night. Perched on your Dads horse and cart, delivering milk down streets your Dad knew everybody coming out with jugs.
Nanas breath stops
(Too long)
He paints a line
(breath) Grandad a railway porter laughing with his mate as you and your sisters struggled (breath) with luggage
to Knaresborough B&B. You got together following evening at River Nidds spectacular ‘Down Mexico Way’, river boats all multi (breath) coloured lit up
(breath stops)
BirminghamWartime Munitions worker, you hated it, all (breath) dirt and grime, but got to see Grandad, (Railway worker in North Wales, but mostly hospitalised).
Returned Sunderland (breath) pregnant with mum. Later Grandad told you no more kids as he’d had mumps.
Paints a line.
Harrogate, Mum (breath) persuaded you to buy detached house. Starbeck Coal depot, weighing lorries in and out. Later you cleaned fridges, stocked shelves, on till at M&S. Grandad, (breath) black bike, black metal bicycle clips delivered post. Did Littlewoods football coupons, Spot-the-ball on a small (breath) laminated brown kitchen table.
Paints a line
Sunday dinners smallest room, tables out into hallway weighed down with feast. Nights friends, (breath) played Newmarket, Yahtzee. Holidays abroad, Germany, France, Brazil.
After mum, only daughter died of Cancer, Grandad (breath) Alzheimers, messed bathroom, bed, till he died, too.
Paints a line
On your own, (breath) I did shopping, sorted bills, admin. We chose (breath) nursing home where you fell into unconsciousness, packing to return home.
Nanas breath stops.
Too long.
Too long.
Too long.
It is a strange trick.
Hear distant sound on road see car lights up close.
Bright white headlamps run at angle to security camera.
We’re not allowed Teevee. This is better.
We control our point of view.
controls in old pit managers office.
One camera bolted to one leg of pit head gear. Another on corner of our flatroofed office.
pit stack is silhouette.
golf course on outskirts bright till 11. A high point.
We walk down long well-kept drive at 3.30 look at orange lights
of villages/ towns spread out below. call them diamond necklaces,
they’re broken.
Looking through lens
cars all light for a second.
One brightness
separates into two distinct blazes. follow their drive past
see two become one again.
Sometimes with car behind another, one becomes four.
cameras only see shades black/white.
One by one cameras will stop working and controls taken away.
Sometimes local police comes for coffee. Chat on crimes committed in town.
We wait for our inspector turning into drive,
exit back way. make it look like we’ve been patrolling.
His son said His (cough) annoying cough, in every sentence, up with the phlegm.
In Sixties, a child (cough) I kept at him ‘Have a drink of water, Dad.’
In retirement (cough) he climbed Lake District moutains up through forests, Ben Nevis, coughing every sentence.
2000s specialist asked (cough) whether he had worked with Asbestos.
‘Only cleaning boilers when (cough) I was young.’
Asbestos dust thickens (cough) his lungs (pleura), diffuse pleural thickening, drying lungs (cough) branches and twigs
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At Eight at the top of Forest Lane playground, climbing frame A bigger boy Pushed him ‘You’d better Run Because I will smash your face in’ So he ran down, his laughter echoing down Forest Lane Weeping out of breath
To his mothers cul de sac arms
Aged nine, Darrington C.of E.
school playtime down around
grey gravel playground breathing hard
boys chase girls, grab girls, red faced,
girls giggling, stroppy,
out of breath
boys herd girls down stone steps,
between stone walls, up against black
wooden gate
Apple Pie shaped school entrance
they called The Apple Pie.
Or
Kerry Fretwell, prettiest girl in school,
nicknamed Froggy, eyes glinting
at him he’d catch his breath
as she chose boys to take
a lesson in kissing
with her apple pie lips
behind prefab
he wanted her to choose him,
if she did he’d run a mile
out of breath
When this brain Is medically dead . will I pray I locked the door?
Or made presentable by morticians knife fret I left the Box plugged in;
Then lowered so others cast first soil or flame-grilled to fine urn ash tell myself I left the oven on;
Or gladly leave this legacy a real reminder how I used to be.
Vern half way down collects wood
for his fire, leave it out front
Leave out anything metal Gypsies at top have sharp eyes,
Stan, two doors down
wants his radiator gone.
Dave next door holds ladder
while I look at roof tiles
and shares homemade ale after.
Our roofers knew man who murdered
a man
at bottom.
I thought someone murdered
at top but our lass swears
he was only badly beaten
Old gent Tommy three doors down
quiet when his wife died last Summer
Put thumbs up when I cleared
his path of Snow last Winter.
Pear tree in back garden bagged
up by them all when ripe
as too much for our lass and me.
Reading Marvel comics age ten
Reading Marvel comics age 51
Skyrider of the Spaceways
Twitter rider of the Internet Highway
Herald of Galactacus
Adviser in a call centre
Manipulator of all energy
Payer of energy bills
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At thirteen, he was lucky
not to be goaded down Goff oil, spithole: steps to cellars outside
in playground lads hawk up spit goff on you laugh at you
Holgate comp black blazer tie pristine he was unlucky to have same name
as Cock of school so gangs would face him, one lad poking him in chest
‘Cock of School, cock of School’, till stepping back he fell backwards over gang lad crouched down onto wet, damp gravel to their echoing laughter.
At Sixteen listened to Led Zep, Rush at their houses now he was sat at front of class while teacher out of room they threw screwed up paper, pens, rubbers, board rubbers at him
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Reinvent remains.
As Security Guard
protect valuable rust, walk redundant coal Washers
who’s decaying steel Washers frame a site a village.
observatory to some guards,
ancient paths across compound.
bomb sites after a war, 
adventure playground’ for kids throw stones at unused Washers. A guard shouts ‘Oi! Bugger off.’
Accuses them making wasteland useful
An art gallery: artists,
photograph pencil record outline, display remains. 
pits filled in.
Soon bulldozers remove inappropriate make an industrial estate.
spoilheap remains
invented as an ordinary hill. Every year while it grew
ancient footpaths raised.
Redundant miners and their dogs haul upwards now stare down at flatroofed units
potential industry.
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The Wombwell Rainbow 