broken coming no false alarm hurried car bumps throws up breathe breathe I am effing…pain short sharp pant now love pain tubemask gasair deep breaths now deep breaths love how long how longs it been hours pain deep breaths come out little one comecalm deep calm almost there dear almost come
slap cry sigh
Year: 2014
Curve: Seven Breaths
…his breath close fitting fingers trace fleshbreaths tight follows her wetcurve her quickening breathlight bends and at heatspeed time slows (at the extent of light and him deep breathing inside her light bends backwards upon itself) deep breathing inside him muscle bends tight curve backwards upon themselves…
First : Seven Breaths
Moving air, blood rhythm, breath rhythm, define sentences a living river living verse giver gold intake fall pipe bone mover
Language is constructed breath, rhythmic gust, pneuma, ruach, spirit, constructed spirit, structured gust, blood rhythm feeds lungs, breath engine
Life: Seven Breaths
Nana is unconsciously breathing.
he sits
on a blue plastic chair (breath) hospital bedside, her white hair, all to one side, thinking she’ll be annoyed (breath) when she wakes
with her hair all to one side.
A nurse explains that though not present
Nana may be (breath) able to hear.
The nurse leaves and Nanas breath stops
(Too long)
Then starts hurriedly, then settles down
A nurse explains it is Cheyne-stokes breathing. He can moisten her lips like this. She wets cotton bud out of white plastic cup, carefully draws bud across Nannas dry lips like painting a line, with water.
He searches web for clues
Nanas breath stops
(Too long)
He paints a line
Typically, over a period of 1 minute, a 10-20 second episode of apnoea or hypopnoea occurs (breath) followed by respirations of increasing depth and frequency. The cycle then repeats itself.
He talks to her, each day
(Breath) Remember the white Sunderland farm
where you were born, Nanna. Stories round its courtyard fire at night. Perched on your Dads horse and cart, delivering milk down streets your Dad knew everybody coming out with jugs.
Nanas breath stops
(Too long)
He paints a line
(breath) Grandad a railway porter laughing with his mate as you and your sisters struggled (breath) with luggage
to Knaresborough B&B. You got together following evening at River Nidds spectacular ‘Down Mexico Way’, river boats all multi (breath) coloured lit up
(breath stops)
BirminghamWartime Munitions worker, you hated it, all (breath) dirt and grime, but got to see Grandad, (Railway worker in North Wales, but mostly hospitalised).
Returned Sunderland (breath) pregnant with mum. Later Grandad told you no more kids as he’d had mumps.
Paints a line.
Harrogate, Mum (breath) persuaded you to buy detached house. Starbeck Coal depot, weighing lorries in and out. Later you cleaned fridges, stocked shelves, on till at M&S. Grandad, (breath) black bike, black metal bicycle clips delivered post. Did Littlewoods football coupons, Spot-the-ball on a small (breath) laminated brown kitchen table.
Paints a line
Sunday dinners smallest room, tables out into hallway weighed down with feast. Nights friends, (breath) played Newmarket, Yahtzee. Holidays abroad, Germany, France, Brazil.
After mum, only daughter died of Cancer, Grandad (breath) Alzheimers, messed bathroom, bed, till he died, too.
Paints a line
On your own, (breath) I did shopping, sorted bills, admin. We chose (breath) nursing home where you fell into unconsciousness, packing to return home.
Nanas breath stops.
Too long.
Too long.
Too long.
Cameras
It is a strange trick.
Hear distant sound on road see car lights up close.
Bright white headlamps run at angle to security camera.
We’re not allowed Teevee. This is better.
We control our point of view.
controls in old pit managers office.
One camera bolted to one leg of pit head gear. Another on corner of our flatroofed office.
pit stack is silhouette.
golf course on outskirts bright till 11. A high point.
We walk down long well-kept drive at 3.30 look at orange lights
of villages/ towns spread out below. call them diamond necklaces,
they’re broken.
Looking through lens
cars all light for a second.
One brightness
separates into two distinct blazes. follow their drive past
see two become one again.
Sometimes with car behind another, one becomes four.
cameras only see shades black/white.
One by one cameras will stop working and controls taken away.
Sometimes local police comes for coffee. Chat on crimes committed in town.
We wait for our inspector turning into drive,
exit back way. make it look like we’ve been patrolling.
Dust : Seven Breaths
His son said His (cough) annoying cough, in every sentence, up with the phlegm.
In Sixties, a child (cough) I kept at him ‘Have a drink of water, Dad.’
In retirement (cough) he climbed Lake District moutains up through forests, Ben Nevis, coughing every sentence.
2000s specialist asked (cough) whether he had worked with Asbestos.
‘Only cleaning boilers when (cough) I was young.’
Asbestos dust thickens (cough) his lungs (pleura), diffuse pleural thickening, drying lungs (cough) branches and twigs
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Apple Pie, Seven Breaths, Free
At Eight at the top of Forest Lane playground, climbing frame A bigger boy Pushed him ‘You’d better Run Because I will smash your face in’ So he ran down, his laughter echoing down Forest Lane Weeping out of breath
To his mothers cul de sac arms
Aged nine, Darrington C.of E.
school playtime down around
grey gravel playground breathing hard
boys chase girls, grab girls, red faced,
girls giggling, stroppy,
out of breath
boys herd girls down stone steps,
between stone walls, up against black
wooden gate
Apple Pie shaped school entrance
they called The Apple Pie.
Or
Kerry Fretwell, prettiest girl in school,
nicknamed Froggy, eyes glinting
at him he’d catch his breath
as she chose boys to take
a lesson in kissing
with her apple pie lips
behind prefab
he wanted her to choose him,
if she did he’d run a mile
out of breath
Afterthoughts
When this brain Is medically dead . will I pray I locked the door?
Or made presentable by morticians knife fret I left the Box plugged in;
Then lowered so others cast first soil or flame-grilled to fine urn ash tell myself I left the oven on;
Or gladly leave this legacy a real reminder how I used to be.
Bartholomew Street, after Ian McMillans Tempest Avenue
Vern half way down collects wood
for his fire, leave it out front
Leave out anything metal Gypsies at top have sharp eyes,
Stan, two doors down
wants his radiator gone.
Dave next door holds ladder
while I look at roof tiles
and shares homemade ale after.
Our roofers knew man who murdered
a man
at bottom.
I thought someone murdered
at top but our lass swears
he was only badly beaten
Old gent Tommy three doors down
quiet when his wife died last Summer
Put thumbs up when I cleared
his path of Snow last Winter.
Pear tree in back garden bagged
up by them all when ripe
as too much for our lass and me.
Silver Surfer Meets Silver Surfer
Reading Marvel comics age ten
Reading Marvel comics age 51
Skyrider of the Spaceways
Twitter rider of the Internet Highway
Herald of Galactacus
Adviser in a call centre
Manipulator of all energy
Payer of energy bills
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The Wombwell Rainbow 